Little Johnny Jokes: 60 Hilarious and Original Jokes

Introduction

Little Johnny jokes have been a staple in humor for years, known for their clever twists and often mischievous punchlines. Whether you’re looking to entertain friends or simply need a good laugh, these jokes are sure to deliver. Below are 200 brand-new, original Little Johnny jokes that you can enjoy and share with others.

1-20: Classic Little Johnny Jokes

1. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you late?”
   Little Johnny: “Because class started before I got here!”
2. Teacher: “Johnny, can you name the continents?”
   Little Johnny: “Sure, but why don’t we start with the small ones?”
3. Teacher: “Johnny, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
   Little Johnny: “A grown-up!”
4. Teacher: “Johnny, where’s your homework?”
   Little Johnny: “I ate it because you said it was a piece of cake!”
5. Teacher: “Johnny, spell ‘crocodile’.”
   Little Johnny: “K-R-O-K-O-D-I-L-E.”
   Teacher: “That’s wrong!”
   Little Johnny: “Maybe, but you asked how I spell it.”
6. Mom: “Johnny, clean your room.”
   Little Johnny: “But it’s not dirty, it’s just creative chaos!”
7. Teacher: “Why did you put your homework in the freezer, Johnny?”
   Little Johnny: “I wanted to have cool answers!”
8. Dad: “Johnny, how do you like school?”
   Little Johnny: “Closed!”
9. Teacher: “Why are you doing your math homework on the floor?”
   Little Johnny: “Because you said not to use tables!”
10. Mom: “Johnny, eat your vegetables.”
    Little Johnny: “I’m saving them for when I grow up big and strong.”
11. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you drawing on the wall?”
    Little Johnny: “Because the paper is full!”
12. Teacher: “Johnny, your essay on your dog is exactly like your brother’s!”
    Little Johnny: “Well, it’s the same dog!”
13. Mom: “Johnny, what did you learn in school today?”
    Little Johnny: “Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow!”
14. Teacher: “Johnny, why didn’t you do your homework?”
    Little Johnny: “I have a condition that prevents me from doing it.”
    Teacher: “What’s that?”
    Little Johnny: “It’s called ‘laziness.'”
15. Dad: “Johnny, why did you break the window?”
    Little Johnny: “I wanted to see how the baseball would look on the other side.”
16. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s the formula for water?”
    Little Johnny: “H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.”
    Teacher: “What? That’s not right!”
    Little Johnny: “You said it’s H to O!”
17. Mom: “Johnny, where’s your report card?”
    Little Johnny: “I lent it to a friend. He wanted to scare his parents.”
18. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s the capital of France?”
    Little Johnny: “F.”
19. Dad: “Johnny, did you finish your homework?”
    Little Johnny: “No, I finished thinking about it.”
20. Teacher: “Johnny, why do you always sit next to the window?”
    Little Johnny: “So I can let my mind wander.”

21-40: Little Johnny at Home

21. Mom: “Johnny, why did you eat all the cookies?”
    Little Johnny: “I was helping them escape from the jar.”
22. Dad: “Johnny, where’s the remote?”
    Little Johnny: “It ran away with the cookie jar lid.”
23. Mom: “Johnny, why didn’t you make your bed?”
    Little Johnny: “Why should I? I’m just going to mess it up again tonight!”
24. Dad: “Johnny, what do you want for dinner?”
    Little Johnny: “Reservations.”
25. Mom: “Johnny, you have to share your toys with your sister.”
    Little Johnny: “But sharing means I get half back, right?”
26. Dad: “Johnny, who ate the cake?”
    Little Johnny: “The invisible man… I mean, I didn’t see who did it.”
27. Mom: “Johnny, why didn’t you feed the dog?”
    Little Johnny: “I was saving him for dinner.”
28. Dad: “Johnny, why are you watching TV when you have homework?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m multitasking – learning from the commercials.”
29. Mom: “Johnny, clean your room or no dessert!”
    Little Johnny: “Can I choose the dessert and skip the cleaning?”
30. Dad: “Johnny, why are you writing on the walls?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m creating a masterpiece!”
31. Mom: “Johnny, why are you wearing your shoes in the house?”
    Little Johnny: “To save time when I go out again!”
32. Dad: “Johnny, why are you wearing your pants backwards?”
    Little Johnny: “So I can see where I’ve been.”
33. Mom: “Johnny, who left the door open?”
    Little Johnny: “The wind, probably. It has a key!”
34. Dad: “Johnny, how did the cookie jar break?”
    Little Johnny: “It tried to run away, but I caught it!”
35. Mom: “Johnny, stop jumping on the bed!”
    Little Johnny: “I’m practicing my astronaut skills.”
36. Dad: “Johnny, why did you spill the milk?”
    Little Johnny: “The glass was tired, so it took a nap.”
37. Mom: “Johnny, where did you learn to talk like that?”
    Little Johnny: “From the cat. It’s always meowing!”
38. Dad: “Johnny, did you finish your vegetables?”
    Little Johnny: “Yes, they’re hidden under the mashed potatoes.”
39. Mom: “Johnny, why are you wearing your hat indoors?”
    Little Johnny: “To keep my ideas warm!”
40. Dad: “Johnny, why are you standing on the chair?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m trying to reach new heights!”

41-60: Little Johnny at School

41. Teacher: “Johnny, why is your homework sticky?”
    Little Johnny: “I thought it needed a little syrup.”
42. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s the square root of 16?”
    Little Johnny: “A round number!”
43. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you staring at the clock?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m timing how long it takes for class to end.”
44. Teacher: “Johnny, what did you write for your essay?”
    Little Johnny: “I wrote a story about a lost pencil.”
45. Teacher: “Johnny, where’s your project?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m working on a sequel.”
46. Teacher: “Johnny, why do you have so many erasers?”
    Little Johnny: “To fix my mistakes!”
47. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you always daydreaming?”
    Little Johnny: “Because my dreams are better than math class.”
48. Teacher: “Johnny, why did you draw on your desk?”
    Little Johnny: “I wanted to make it more interesting.”
49. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s the capital of Spain?”
    Little Johnny: “S.”
50. Teacher: “Johnny, why didn’t you finish your test?”
    Little Johnny: “I was saving some answers for later.”
51. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you talking in class?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m practicing my speech for when I’m famous.”
52. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s the formula for speed?”
    Little Johnny: “How fast you can run away from homework!”
53. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you late?”
    Little Johnny: “I took the scenic route to school.”
54. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you chewing gum in class?”
    Little Johnny: “It helps me concentrate… on the gum.”
55. Teacher: “Johnny, what’s your favorite subject?”
    Little Johnny: “Recess!”
56. Teacher: “Johnny, where’s your textbook?”
    Little Johnny: “It’s on a vacation in my locker.”
57. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you always the last to leave?”
    Little Johnny: “I’m making sure the classroom is safe.”
58. Teacher: “Johnny, what did you learn today?”
    Little Johnny: “That school is still boring.”
59. Teacher: “Johnny, why are you hiding